so i haven't done a prune of the week post since may. i guess i haven't had that many things to rant about due to my general jolly disposition.
yeah, that's about to come to an end.
ya'll ready for a good old fashioned rant?
here goes.
-i just got home from tanning because my "office white" skin has got to get a little color prior to my aruba trip next week. so i'm at the salon counter and the bad highlights salon girl looks at me and asks if i wanted to buy lotion. "no thanks" i said "i'm fine". she then straight faced looks at me and responds, "if you don't buy lotion you will get skin cancer". WTF? how do you say something like that?!??! i'm already hypersensitive to the topic and i did not need some bimbo making idle threats. no thanks tanning salon.
-after work today i also got a trusty oil change. where i got in a friendly disagreement with the attendant who told me that i needed a new air conditioner filter. i passed stating that i only have 10100 miles on my car and my owners manual states that i don't need one until 15000 miles and i would look into purchasing one on my next oil change. but he didn't let up, telling me that my owners manual was wrong and that i just didn't know better. no thanks dude.
-i have to pack enough clothes for over a week while throwing a wedding into the mix, i think this may be impossible.
-i need to do 273 loads of laundry and clean my entire apartment before i leave and instead of doing so i'm sitting on my deck stressing out and typing this little post.
-since my vegan 30 days is officially over today (yay me! see ya extra lbs!), i am going to try to ween myself back on to "normal" food and off of the random ciggies. the fact that i was really good about what i was eating but felt the urge to smoke again to stop myself from cheating during this month was horrible. no thanks smoking.
-i must admit that i am enjoying facebook even though at times i think it's the devil's playground - much like my freshman year dorm room - but that's another story. i'm asking why must the targeted advertising on the site hit so close to home? my two favorite ads from today - "are you 28 and looking to stay slim?" and "almost 30 and wondering if you are ever going to find a man?". GAH!!! are you there god, it's me, alexa, please, pretty pretty please with a cherry on top stop these ads from gracing my computer screen. no thanks reminders.
-if i hear one more of my guy or girl friends bitch about hating being single but then say they "aren't ready for a girlfriend/boyfriend" i am going to promptly kick them in the shins.
-people that are sexist
-when i got to work this morning and unpacked my laptop bag i noticed that the remote control to my living room tv was in the bag. i chuckled, set the remote on my desk and went about my business. well you can guess where the remote is - still on my desk. bummer for me because i can't turn on my dish cable without the specific remote. no thanks tv.
-i have a really bad eye prescription. so i just ordered new contacts last week and for a years supply (1 pair per quarter) the grand total is $325!!! and that is after insurance. c-ya extra vacation money.
i have promptly decided that today is just one of those days and i will listen to monica over and over again while ignoring all my phone calls.
END RANT - well that was just exhausting.
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36 comments:
Hands down, one of my favorite posts ever - singing along to Monica before I go to bed! I highly enjoyed your prunes.
I hate that when the stupid guys changing your oil act like since you're a girl they can trick you into buying stuff. That always pisses me off too!
That song brings back memories. I don't even want to think about how old that song is.
Oh My God. I cannot believe that girl tried to tell you that you would get skin cancer on the basis of you not buying a twenty dollar lotion. Oh the ridiculousness. I would have gotten all smarty pants on her and said, "really, I am sure you know all about that, oh wait, you don't have a medical degree to diagnose that and why? Oh right because you work here at a tanning salon."
What a moron. I bet she was blonde and smacked her bubble gum. Hey I am blonde, just not stupid.
Eek! Lex! You're falling apart since I'm gone!!
To add to one of your prunes. I also just bought a years worth of contacts and it was over $500!! Holy Moly!
And the worst plum of all?? I miss my neighbor! I'm at the beach with my mom and friend and our neighbor here looks just like Jesus! And for some reason he creeped out my mom so much that she is sleeping with her mace gun under her pillow! (remember that she is also a georgia girl so well versed in any type of fire arm)
So cheer up bub and think ARUUUUUBBBAAA!!!
Bad Highlights Lady sounds like a douche. I would have growled at her.
I cannot believe bad highlights girl said that to you. That's bad. Bad as in she should get fired for saying that bad. Eh.
Also, I hate when people at oil change places try to convince you they need to do something to your car. It happens to me ALL THE TIME, and it pisses me off, too.
Me thinks lotion isn't a miracle cure for skin cancer either...fail, Tanning Girl.
Monica was so awesome. Where'd she go?
I dont get that thing about the tanning lotion! why would she even say that?
If you don't buy the lotion you will get skin cancer? Wow. I'm sure they are meant to ENCOURAGE people to use their lotion, but a blanket statement about a lack of THEIR lotion causing skin cancer? Personally I don't use tanning beds, but if I did..I wouldn't go there anymore.
The remote control thing is hysterical. My remote ends up in the weirdest places in my apt. I have actually left it in the fridge before.
I loved Monica...seriously what happened to her? I still have "The Boy is Mine" on my Ipod.
Being blind is not for the weak of wallet. Like myself.
LOL, the shin kick is fatal...
and mechanics are not trustworthy. Good job.
Ha, I would have told tanning salon gal "oh my gosh! really?? then why am i here???" and left and gone to another salon. Ok, I probably wouldn't have, but would have thought it at least.
Congrats on making it through your vegan month!
I hate going to get my oil changed because they love telling me how much my car sucks and needs to get everything in the world done!
Oh Monica, what would we ever do without you?
i hear you on the contact front. DEAR MONEY, I DIDN'T WANT YOU ANYWAY. HRMPH.
i think i would have busted out laughing in the tanning girl's face. possibly snorted at her.
RE: the oil changes. I just got fancy new snow wipers 2 weeks before my oil change and they kept urging me to get new ones. um, their new smart guy! he actually told me they were "worn" like im that big an idiot.
block those nasty ads on facebook with the adblocker!! i mean, you are using firefox, right!??
haha! great post!
Sexist people suck. Now go make me a sammich, Alexa.
aww too many prunes
-what was up with that tanning lady? who the hell says stuff like that?
-facebook ads are so weird... "are you 23 and need to lose weight?" is one that i see constantly..it's like they're trying to let me know that i'm fat
-aww monica..wonder what she's doing these days anyway
I really hate pushy people at car places. Even if it needed to be changed, it doesn't mean I have the money for it. Relax cowboy!
Nothing wrong with a little sexism now and then. We all need it and then...
Oh, sexISM. Hmm. nevermind.
Celebrate your non vegan status by eating an egg.
i would have snapped at both the tanning people and the car people, sheesh. rant away, sounds like you need it! haha. :)
that's so annoying, the salon comment! she's totally ignorant too, you should have said "um, yeah and putting on lotion prevents cancer?even if you're purposely attepting to burn your skin" hmm, wonder why they don't put that on the label.. and by the way, im all for sunbathing. love it!
Wow. I would rant as well. "You will get skin cancer" wtf??? She's probably upset she didn't pass her GED.
Wow! So much going on with you! I'm exhausted just reading about it!
i like your rants here! i can relate to many. congrats on your vegan adventure! im so totally with you on the facebook ads. way to make a single girl want to check out.
well that was a little dramatic, but still.
have a great trip! im envious!
All of my facebook ads are for losing weight and engagement rings. But I really think it's because I'm a girl and am listed as in a relationship. SUCKS.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=uoI_OCyHS_Q
what that gal would be hawking on the other side of the world.
Once I brought my home portable phone with me in my purse. I got really pissed off when I tried to make a call and it wouldn't work.
And then I realized...oh. Not a cell phone.
The blond is REAL.
isn't it amazing what you pack with you when you're in a hurry to run out the door? i know, i've done it too!
harbor inn rocks!
My facebook ads are along the lines of "Tired of meeting the wrong guys?" and "Single guys aer waiting for you".
Congrats on your vegan month. I'm sorta trying to do it too, and everytime I want to eat a steak I think of you and the pounds you've dropped. You are AWESOME!
Tsk, tsk on the ciggies, though. They're bad for you.
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