i've cried too many times in the past two days than i'd care to admit (don't worry, i'm fine). but of course in my usual style i will find a way to make fun of myself for it.
i'm good at being self deprecating, so i'll stick with it.
i have decided today that there are two main types of criers.
there are the beautiful women who still look fabulous even when they are "crying". their eye makeup never smears, they daintily will have one gigantic crocodile tear roll down their cheek, then their strappingly handsome male companion ever so gently blots away the single tear. "there, there, oh fair one. it will be alright." "thanks", she replies, "i feel so much better now."
then there is me. first there's the burning sensation that starts in the back of my eyes. then my lip starts to quiver - immediately my inner monologue is saying, "don't do it, there's no crying in baseball, don't do it!"
next i bite my lip. trying feverishly now not to let my voice crack (if i'm speaking). but a time inevitably comes when i can't fight the tears back, they are going to flow and i better brace myself.
my eyes get bright red, so will my noise and my lips. yes, my lips even get red. i will of course not have a tissue around and will end up wiping my tears (usually black from makeup) with my shirt. i will most likely still be trying to talk to someone about why i'm crying and i will let out a bit of a sigh, perheps even a small yelp or a catch of my breath.
yes, i'm THAT kind of crier.
sexy huh? who wants to make out?
you do! awesome! i promise i only cry at sad movies, when i stub my toe, at weddings, when i get mean anonymous comments, when the bottle of wine is empty, at work, when i look at my credit card bill, before - during - and after sex, on new years eve, when it's last call, when i can't find my zoolander dvd, when my flower pots die, when the nordstrom's shoe sale rack doesn't have my size, when my contact falls out, when i have no service on my bberry, and when the candle burns out.
the above list? i made it up, i only cry at two of those things. i'll let you use your imagination as to which two i actually cry at.
so what kind of crier are you? or don't you cry at all?