look out tree!

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

tonight is my work holiday party.

now i can imagine one would think that it stinks being on a work night but in all reality i am glad it is because it will cause me to not over drink and get caught up in the debauchery that was last years holiday function. it is a school night after all.

i'm very lucky to have a job that i love and work with a great group of people which causes work functions to be pretty damn fun - sometimes too much fun.

for example for last years holiday party my bosses got a party bus and the whole company hopped in on a friday afternoon and headed to erie, pennsylvania to go party at one of our clients restaurants.

the bus was stocked with adult beverages and i may or may not have polished off a bottle of wine during the hour and a half trip that consisted of games and prizes. when we got to the irish pub in quaint downtown erie, pa we ate, we drank, shot irish car bombs and sampled whiskey, getting a little rambunctious. you'll have that with our group.

towards the end of the evening i ran out of cigarettes and decided to walk myself to the corner store and pick up another pack. i stumble into the store and get in line.


and wait.

and wait.

still waiting...

i didn't have anything else to do while waiting so i chatting up with the people around me in line. these people were interesting to say the least. but i was drunk in a random small town far away from home, what did i know?

so 25 minutes passes and i was thinking to myself, wow this must be a hopping corner store - how long can it really take to buy a pack of parliment ultra lights? when i finally get to be second in line the young lady in front of me turns and asks me a question....

"would you hold my baby for a second?"

"um, um, sure - i guess", taking the 6 month old little girl.

the first thought that went through my head was that this broad was going to bolt and leave me with the baby. thankfully when she was done she took the kid back.

i think my mouth was still open in awe when i stepped up to the counter and ordered my cigs. the guy working the counter looked at me blankly and said ma'am this is the welfare check cashing line - you need to step down to the register to the right.

craaaaaaaaaaaaap - no wonder it was taking so long. guess i was a tink more inebriated than i thought.

so finally after holding a baby and standing in the PA welfare line i got what i went to the corner store for. i started to head back to the bar to meet up with the group - who thought i had been kidnapped in erie because i took so long.

eventually it was time to head back to cleveland so we all boarded the party bus having a singing and dance-off party all the way back to ohio. did i mention i work with ridiculously fun people?

next stop the lava lounge in tremont where there was chilled patron and my friends georgia peach and nameless to come pick me up and take me home.

stick a fork in me, i was done.

but not before i tackled a christmas tree on w 9th - i'll end it with that.


[don't forget to enter my holiday giveaway, the last day to enter is this wednesday!]

34 comments:

  1. You and that Christmas tree is still the funniest thing I've ever seen! You just wanted to give it a hug - but in the process knocked down every single one.

    At least you were wearing your vest! That item of clothing was extremely handy!

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  2. I'd much rather work for a company like yours, where the bosses spend money on their employees ... unlike a company, say like Siemens, where the bosses stuff suitcases full of money to pay bribes to others for business. Where's the fun in that? Plus, if I worked for your company, I'd get to see you every day. I can only imagine what that would be like!!! =)

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  3. I wishh I worked for a fun company like that. Most of the people I work with are older. That story though -- the welfare line, holding the baby, running into a tree -- that sounds like a good time. Have fun at your party!

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  4. They canceled our party. Before that instead of fun parties they wasted money on dumb gifts, like, wind up flash lights w/radio.

    That sounds like a killer time. There is a welfare check place like that in barberton. lol! classic!

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  5. Who just hands over a baby to a stranger?

    wtf?

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  6. "Can you hold my baby" would make for a great pickup line.

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  7. The likelihood of you gaining a baby in the welfare cheque line is probably pretty high! After a night of drinking you too could have become a mother...

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  8. Ok i can't stop laughing. That? Is an awesome story. Have a great time at your non-welfare-line Holiday party tonight:)

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  9. How fun!! My work sucks, we are not getting a Christmas party this year. Bastards!

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  10. ha!
    have fun tonight lady! i bet you're wearing some sort of red accent, aren'tcha?

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  11. omg please tell me there is photos somewhere of you tackling a tree?!

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  12. Oh LORD. hahahaha

    we need to hang out soon

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  13. You seriously had to hold a stranger's baby??!

    Cripes. I'd be running in the opposite direction.

    Oh - and stop smoking :)

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  14. This was one of the best stories ever.

    I'm so jealous of your work.

    Have I told you that enough yet?

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  15. thank goodness that was a friday night!

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  16. I'd like a welfare check for Christmas! Also, I'm really glad that the lady who asked you to hold your baby, while losing a lot of points for handing her offspring to a drunk stranger, was not on line for cigarettes.

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  17. Your company does what now? Bus, trip, lots of alcohol.

    I hate my place of work.

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  18. ah, i was so waiting for the lady to make a run for it and leave you with the baaaaby.

    welfare line in the middle of the night? that seems almost more odd than you standing in the line for 1/2 an hour. hrm.

    enjoy your party tonight, miss.

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  19. That tree had it coming. It was giving you the stink eye.

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  20. Erie, PA? Why?

    the only time I was in Erie, PA I burned that mother down.

    Ok, I didn't

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  21. AAAAAAAAAAAAhahahahahahah! I love everything about this post. Everything.

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  22. Ahaha, that's fantastic. The Christmas tree incident, I think, is probably a common occurrence around the country. But not the welfare check line incident. THAT'S classic.

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  23. You people are lame. We did a Yankee Swap and then sang Christmas carols at our party.

    Suck on THAT party girl.

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  24. Haha wow that is the best holiday party ever. You're lucky to work for a cool company with cool people!

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  25. sounds sort of like the ridiculousness of my work parties, haha. hope you have a great time, even if it is on a school night :)

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  26. I think I like you more after reading this post about office holiday parties.

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  27. I would LOVE to go party with you. Your holiday party sounds awesome. I could have used a cigarette this year.

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  28. Sissy, I never knew this story. That is Hilarious! I'm still laughing about it now! i can't imagine being handed the baby.. especially if i was drunk! so funny!

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  29. Oh no! The welfare line? I wish my holiday parties ended up like this.

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  30. Tackling a tree to end the night? That is perfect.

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  31. Your holiday party sounds better than all my holiday parties put together. I'm glad to know you kicked that tree's ass.

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  32. You TACKLED a CHRISTMAS TREE? Really. Color me impressed.

    Also, when you talked about the line being really long and waiting and waiting and waiting, I honestly thought you were going to say they left you in Erie. *shrugs* I'm glad they didn't.

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