swap it up

Monday, June 30, 2008

my blogs' cherry has now officially been popped with its first ever guest blogger! my little blog was all nervous and awkward about having her cherry popped not knowing if she was going to be any good. but they she realized that her master was alexa and her cherry was popped a loooooooooooong time ago and she's had lots of practice so there is nothing to worry about.

so, may i present you with the 20 something bloggers great blog swap! the following post is from angela noelle who writes the blog tomorrow is another day.

also, be sure to go check out my post about my deathly fear of all things bird. ew. they are the rats of the sky i tell you. i know you want to read about how i was TRAPPED in my apartment yesterday! not cool bird, not cool.


*************


Hello, Cleveland's A Plum readers! I'm Angela--also known as Wickedly Scarlett around these here internet parts--from Tomorrow is Another Day, and I've had the pleasure of being paired with Alexa for the Twenty Something Bloggers Great Blog Swap. So, I'm posting here, and Alexa is posting there--it's just like Freaky Friday! Only hopefully without the washing machine malfunction. And the actual body swapping.

Anyway, I'm sitting here on this lovely Sunday evening, enjoying the sunshine that Seattle has finally decided to grace its residents with, watching season one of Mad Men, eating my fifth cupcake of the day and trying as hard as possible to not think about the fact that tomorrow is my first day of school in five years.

If you had told me just three months ago that I would even be contemplating going back to school in the near future, I would have laughed in your face. Rude, but true. In fact, my husband has been batting around the idea of grad school for the past couple of years, and every time he brings it up I have stated with all seriousness that I would never go back to icky old school. School means tests, papers, tons of fairly uninteresting reading, and worst of all group work. Shudder.

But something happened a little over two months ago. It was on the train from Naples to Rome when my turned to my husband and said hesitantly, "You know, I've been thinking of going back to school to become a teacher." When the world did not cease to spin on its axis, I didn't sprout a second head, and Colby didn't pass out in a dead faint or laugh uproariously, I realized that for the first time in the past two years, when I had brought up a possible career field that I might have a glimmer of interest in, I actually meant it.

As soon as we got home I started doing some research--leaning heavily on the blogosphere of course, because I am incapable of making decisions without the input of my readers--and found a school that fit all of my criteria--chiefly that I could get this school larnin' done as quickly as possible and preferably while wearing pajamas. A few weeks ago, I was notified of my acceptance into an elementary education masters with certification program, and that brings us back to today, as I sit on my couch, my stomach in knots while I stress out over the fact that my third and last textbook still hasn't arrived.

The beauty of this first day of school is that all of my classes are online, so tomorrow morning I can wake up, run some errands, pick up a friend at the airport, visit the Space Needle, go out to dinner and then just come home and log in to my class site before midnight. I can tell you right now, that schedule trumps every single semester of my undergraduate degree when I would sweat and slave over every course time slot to ensure optimum sleeping in arrangements. So, as you're reading this on Monday, I'm probably scanning the syllabus, paging through a textbook, trying not to cry when I see the phrase "compare and contrast", or you know, eating some clam chowder. So wish me luck, and please, don't feel the need to share your best elementary teacher torture stories, I'm still residing firmly in the land of denial in that regard!

and to think the weekend isn't over yet

Sunday, June 29, 2008

friday morning i had the pleasure of having a couple of my favorite bloggers make a pit stop in cleveland to see little 'ol me on their way to chicago to see a heck of a lot more bloggers.

maxie and deutlich landed in cleveland around 9am and we headed to my favorite breakfast place in cleveland the west side market cafe.

in all of my excitement of showing them around i didn't notice a piece of wood laying on the sidewalk.


i bit it, HARD.

the sidewalk kicked my ass. the fall tore my brand new shoe and killed my knee, it swelled instantly. and not o
nly did i fall and hurt myself but i fell with my blackberry in my left hand scratching it up badly. it works but my new baby looks like it got in a fight.

deutlich got a great photo on me lying on the sidewalk. i'll steal
it from her if she posts it and show you wall what an idiot i looked like. talk about a great first impression!

the girls and i then went to the
rock and roll hall of fame for some musical education. i think the girls were very excited about the museum and had a great time buying souvenirs and posing with the very large guitars...

strike a pose ladies

all i can say that these two bloggers are not only awesome as hell they are genuine people. and to me that's tops. actually, as i type this they are about an hour away from cleveland on their way back home and are going to take a break in cleveland again. hip hop hooray!

now onto the rest of the weekend.
friday night muffin and some friends and i headed to bar cento for dinner and drinks. as usual this place was excellent. with this whole vegan diet i'm on i couldn't really order much off the menu so i ask
ed out server dana what i could get.

let's just say i g
ot hooked up! chef sawyer sent me over a plate of wonderful vegetables - broccoli, asparagus, peas and roasted fennel bulbs, um yum. he even came over to say hello which is always appreciated. i'll say it again, if you haven't gone to bar cento yet - GO! what are you waiting for?

after our meal we headed next door to
bier market for more drinks and shots. there was a really good crowd there, i have decided i need to go there more often, for real.

ladies, all the ladies - minus me ; )

after bier market we wanted to go dancing. next stop ultra.

we were all ready to bust a move but the dj wasn't exactly helping in that department.
misterbradleyp was at the tables and normally i love the dude but he was seriously out of his element. when i go to ultra i want top 40 hip hop and he
was playing songs that he would play at bside. oh well, it is what it is and instead of dancing we just drank more.

saturday i felt like ass. mostly because i drank like i normally do but forgot about the fact that i have been eating rabbit food for a week. oops.

feeling like ass aside i rallied for mishler's bridal shower and
bachlorette party in akron. all 30 of us showered her with nice gifts and then showered her with penis' and alcohol. classy.

the dirrrrrrrrty stuff didn't happen till after the moms left of course!


the party was so great and no one deserves happiness and fun more than my mishler! this girl has a great group of friends who helped her celebrate. there were tons of drunk mishler stories shared and there may or may not have been some turds involved ; )

the bridesmaids put a great spread together in the
presidential sweet at the radisson hotel downtown but hands down the highlight of the spread was this cake. again, we are a classy group.

strategic icing placement...

i had to duck out of the bachlorette party earlier than i would have liked but i needed to head back to cleveland and over to wonger's for a scene going away party. all i can say to that is boo. moving on.

the party at wonger's then moved to the best monthly in cleveland "i got 5 on it" (old school hip hop night), at touch. mick boogie wasn't in town bu
t terry urban rocked it out HARD. he was on fire, the best i've seen him in the last few months. sucks it only happens once a month... but then again i don't really need to be dancing every saturday night till 3am.

so i *think* that's it, well not really because i'm waiting for maxie and duetlich to get here. good lord, i wonder if they are going to "make me" go out again.

twist my arm, thank god it's summer.

UPDATE :: so since i am sitting on my deck with deutlich and maxie, RIGHT NOW and have access to deutlich's pictures i have stolen the awesome photo of myself losing my battle to the sidewalk. crap spilled everywhere, yup that's me.

at least we are drinking a fabulous bottle of wine that they brought me from their road trip. talk about amazing girls they knew how to get to my heart - wine! i seriously love these girls.

just one of the guys

Thursday, June 26, 2008



ya know, me and lebron james are like totally like BFF's. he smacks me on the bum and we dance together at game after parties.

See, look at the picture, i'm even part of his posse at the king for kids bike-a-thon.

lebron was like, "yo! lex, get your white ass over here for a group shot!"

then i was like, "calm the f@ck down lebron, i be there when i get there"

they i got in a fight with duck for taking over my shot and had to beat down the dude in the orange for giving me the wonk eye.

p-sha.

and then i woke up.

thanks court for sending this to me, you totally made my day.

i fully snorted at this when i opened my email which is well, awesome.

wipeout

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

i officially have two new favorite shows for the summer.

wipeout and i survived a japanese game show

(seriously stop judging me i can feel through my laptop)


last night these two shows premiered on abc.

i had been anxious for these show for start for quite a few weeks now their teasers alone had me laughing out loud.

here's one for wipeout for example...



i mean how can you NOT laugh at people falling down?!? the snarky commentators come through in the clutch just making me howl

yes i was howling laughing last night.

all by myself sitting on my comfy red chair eating simply booty, vegan style baby. if you live in my building you could probably hear my laugh from the elevator.

in my opinion (right now), wipeout is way funnier than i survived a japanese gameshow but we'll see if that continues.

am i evil for finding chubby girls and girly boys fall on their ass into puddles of mud hilarious?!?

i hope not.

because i want to be on the show. is there a casting call for one witty not so athletic cleveland blogger?

cause i'm your girl.

let's watch another clip just cause this is my little piece of internet real estate and i can do that.



"good lord, good lord" says tamera.

i can't stop smiling.

did anyone else watch this or am i the only dork that found it this funny?

half foods

Monday, June 23, 2008

going to whole foods, or any grocery store for that matter, makes me feel normal. it calms me down actually.

i always hear stories about how people dread going to the grocery story. but for me there is nothing better than walking into the store with my shopping list and one by one crossing things off my list. knocking on watermelons, smelling cheese and all.

so today i headed to whole foods with a very special grocery list.

i have decided to partake in a little experiment/test for myself.

can u finger it out from some of my grocery list? (yes, i know i used finger instead of figure - go with it, it's like fetch)

tofu
silk soy milk
broccoli
snow peas
bing cherries ($10 worth, oy vey)
soy butter
granola
plums (you know i HAD to go there)
asparagus
miso horny soup cups
puffin cereal
cucumber
edamame
hummus

probably isn't that hard to guess.

for the next 30 days, starting first thing tuesday morning, i am going to be a VEGAN!

i know, i'm nuts.

i have a lot of friends that are vegetarian and have been practicing for awhile. but the thought of trying to not eat meat never interested me, EVER. because well, i really love meat.

that's what she said

i mean i'm greek, lamb is practically served at every meal.

i'll continue.

i see how healthy my vegetarian friends are and all the fresh and organic food they eat so i though to myself i should try it out for 30 days just to see if i can do it. plus the wonderful ashley even provided me with a list of reasons why i should try it! i'm thinking of it kind of like a fast, even though it isn't easter.

i then realized that by being a vegetarian for 30 days i could still technically sit on my couch and eat a fillet o'fish sandwich while slurping down a shamrock shake (mmmm if only it was march).

i needed a more difficult challenge so i decided that being vegan would really make me think of what i was putting in my big mouth.

no cheese?!?! what am i going to do without my favorite food?

but i'll probably drop 15 lbs before my trip to aruba end of july.

this is going to be fun!

i am giving myself one exception to this 30 days of vegan though. my birthday is july 2nd (i like presents) and i am allowing myself to have whatever i want for my birthday dinner. i'm even going to go a day longer to make up for my allowed slip up to make it a full 30 days.

i'm kinda like morgan spurlock but healthier.

hopefully my birthday dinner won't be too hard on my stomach (ew) after all this rabbit food i'll be eating.

so on july 25th my 30 days as a vegan will be over and i guess i'll just have to see what i crave first.

i could end up surprising myself.

wish me luck, i need all i can get!

so here's to fruits and vegetables - and thanking god that vodka is still vegan.

trashfest

Sunday, June 22, 2008


i didn't even want to give roverfest a mention on my blog because it was so gross. but it was that disgusting that i have to elaborate.

when i got home from work on friday i knew it was going to be a rowdy one in the warehouse district from the mass amount of people wandering around already at 5pm.


there were two prominent type of people visiting my neighborhood. full-out trashballs walking around in wife beaters and jean shorts (jorts) - or there were 20-22 year old frat boys with lots product in their hair, uber tan with popped collars.


i didn't think the second type of douchebag was still around, yeah, i was wrong.


so i maintained my original plan of having a cookout at georgia peach's and nameless' apartment with my friends jewfro blue, alymcjew, slappe (minus the s) and tj. we had great dinner and drinks then decided around 10 to walked over to roverfest.


walking out of our apartment was MAYHEM. for real this place was crazy. we walked down lakeside and came to roverfest from the divebar side. there were girls wandering around in bikinis and a massive stage set up on w 6th where they were having a calendar girl search competition. i was on pins and needles to see which stripper was going to win. NOT.


the streets were so packed you couldn't move. people were
grabbing at my purse (no one touches the chloe) and i'm like can we get the hell out of here?!? everyone agreed.

i managed to snap a couple pictures in my short visit to roverfest to try to convey what this fest was really like. i will say though that if i had a seat and steady vodka coming my way it would have been the best people watching ever - but the picture on the right pretty much sums up the attendees of roverfest...


matchy matchy is all the rage i guess - so are patent leather lime green boots..


considering we still wanted to go out we headed to tremont to get safely out of the roverfest net.
cocktails at tremont taphouse were perfect, lots of apple cider shots. it's always a good time there.

so saturday was THE BEST COUCH DAY EVER.


i haven't spent so much time fondling the remote control in ages. it was the perfect tv day. i needed it.


as for today i just got home from having a relaxing boat day with my friend amanda. her and her husband have a boat docked at the
lakeside yacht club and i went and met her. we hung out at the pool and on the boat till the weather forced us in to the club for a late lunch. no complaints on my end, it was so nice of her to invite me!

although i better get another invite this summer when we can actually take the boat out ; )


and if i haven't done enough this weekend i've right now got to get ready for dinner with my mom and two of our good family friends at the flying fig in ohio city. i haven't been there in months i'm so excited!


hope everyone had a great weekend, tomorrow i'm going to be posting about a little experiment i am going to partake in for the next 30 days....

till tomorrow : )

it's summer!!!

Friday, June 20, 2008

bring on the sunshine and rays, this girl is a child of the summer. today is like my birthday, but not.

so to celebrate my summer birthday i bought these shoes from my favorite cleveland boutique banyan tree in tremont.

don't they just scream summer?!?! do my ankles look fat?

i feel like i've been a sucky blogger this week, not really posting anything fun just regurgitating what i do - and frankly i think that's pretty boring.

so until next week when i have sufficient time to be creative you all are just going to have to deal with my scatterbrained post.

last night, me, beaver, MOB, foxxy, patti-o, jilly and darby all had a little dinner party get together at the beav's. i made an awesome lime fish taco dish that i highly recommend everyone trying if you like that sort of thing. tasty.

patti-o also rocked out some beautiful and tasty fruit kabobs and creme "fresh". glorious.

beaver, fruit is quite the accessory for you!

in all reality it doesn't matter where we are or what we are eating or doing whenever my friends and i get together it is always the best time.

as for this weekend i have no major plans.

hold the phone! alert the presses! alexa has no plans this weekend!!! omg.

crap, i just got a text...

i guess im BBQing at georgia peach's. easy enough. i think we are going to wander over to w 6th for roverfest too.

looks like i'm going to be drinking again tonight.

twist my arm.

well i know that the folks over at scene magazine and free times will be drinking their worries away tonight. looks like cleveland is now going to be a one alternative weekly town.

it's kinda sad being that i worked at scene for as long as i did and for all the friends i still have there,but at least the scene name is going to be staying. i'm interested to see how everything is effected.

on that note, i hope everyone has a great weekend! xoxo

i don't think i'm at the crack stage yet

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Blackberry Curve


the above is my new blackberry curve that i picked up just a few hours ago.

I'M SO CONFUSED.

people are asking me for my pin?

blackberry messaging?

what's an SMS message?

how does the blackberry messenger know that i'm typing?!? creepy.

what's up with the messages no matter what type they are all being in the same location?

how can i change my buttons on my home page?

why won't it stop vibrating?!?!?

i don't need to see spam email messaging on my phone.

maybe i shouldn't have added my personal email address.

it this phone going to turn into one big distraction?

can i blog from my blackberry?

where is jenn when i need her?

am i going to figure this phone (mini computer) out before i throw it out the window?

am i a loser if i wear it on my hip? (yeah right)

why is it still vibrating?!?!?! bzzzzzz. bzzzzzzz. bzzzzzzz.

i think i am going to just stop freaking out about the new toy/phone, go to bed and worry about it in the morning. ugh.

night kids ; )

LUXE luther

last night myself, nate, bird, wonger, captain joe, donkers, georgia peach and her nameless husband all went out to dinner at one of cleveland's newest hot spots - LUXE on detriot ave. (for real though, how do they not have a website? come on marlin kaplan get on it!)

anyways, i was very much looking forward to this meal and hanging out with my friends. after hearing nothing but good things it was an obvious choice for the group.

we walked into the bar area of LUXE and who do we see sitting at a table with his wife but my boy
Z! that's zydrunas ilgauskas to all of you non insane cavs fans like myself.

this was going to be a good time!

until i saw, THE WAITER......

this dude has worked his way around tons of restaurants in cleveland like i work my way around an all you can eat buffet.

he has been my dopey server at aladdin's eatery in lakewood where many a lunch hour has been ruined due to his slow pace. he also was my server at crop bistro downtown when my february dinner club was given lukewarm service and attentiveness at best.

maybe my stunning good looks make him nervous, yes?

well i suddenly start to get nervous that the slowest waiter on earth was going to have an effect on my dining experience. my gut was right.

as i watched him walk past our table time and time again without taking our drink order i was starting to get antsy, i was thirsty.

once he finally got our drink order we were happy again because the cocktails were awesome! i had the bloom (LUXE's signature cocktail), made with fresh lavender and bluberry lemonade and citrus vodka. um, yum.

the guys even enjoyed the bloom although nameless stuck with draft PBR, classy.

i had read on a comment that blogging jason left on cleveland foodies blog to try the dark and stormy cocktail made with dark rum, ginger beer and lime. yeah, i tried it and it soooooo wasn't for me. icky. i promptly went back to my bloom concoction.

so THE WAITER was still being slow and awkward when we ordered our dinners...

i first though want to say that they menu was excellent with so many choices. from pizzas and small plates to salads and hearty sandwiches, and pasta with lots of great varieties are all offered at an affordable price point. (<-- that's for you captain joe)

myself and nate had decided to go with one of the specials a filet and crab dish. but when i went to order the awkward waiter said that they were out of filet but could serve the meal with flank steak instead.

i pondered my decision, but steak was already in my head.

flank steak and crab still sounded good so i ordered it anyways. the rest of the group sampled the gnocchi, the carbonara, a portobello pizza and some awesome meat stuffed meat (a large pork chop stuffed with applewood smoked bacon stuffing).

after more rounds of drinks and a looooooooooooooooooong wait to get our entrees they finally arrived.

when my plate was put in front of me sans crab. i asked the manager lady and she said the crab was on there. "it's in the sauce", she said.

um, no it wasn't.

i ignored it, 3 cocktails deep, because i was hungry. but half way through i was sad because my medium ordered steak was well done and there was no crab.

i tell the waiter and he's like "oh, sorry. i don't know why it (crab) wasn't there, let me check." he comes back from the kitchen and offers me some crab.

no thanks, it's too late now buddy.

so my filet and crab entree was served sans filet and sans crab. one would think that nate and i who both ordered it would have received some sort of comp or manager apology but we got nothing. i hope this isn't a trend for them.

hurrrumph.

so here's the thing, was i disappointed with my meal? yes.

but will i go back? yes.

i'm thinking there are just some kinks that need to be worked out and i just had bad luck with THE WAITER again. next time i will sit at the bar (my motherland) and stay as far away from THE WAITER as possible.

sometimes it doesn't matter how good the food is, if the service is sub par so is your experience.

thank god my friends were there to make it better : )

*image courtesy of i heart cleveland blog

and i wonder why im still tired

Monday, June 16, 2008

so i think i finally feel normal after going out three nights in a row, HARD. now some people will say three days? that's nothing. and it may have been nothing for me when i was 23 but 27? wow, that's a different story.

good news though - i can still rock out with the best of them. crisis averted.

so the weekend was great. thursday night was tons of fun, friday during the day was fabulous and friday night even though i tried to take it easy i may or may not have had a few too many.

we had the back room reserved at flannery's and the blueberri stoli's and bombs were a flowing.

i still went home before close though so that's a good sign.

i would have been asleep earlier though if i wasn't awoken by my new roommate and his friends.

so i'm laying in my bed and this dumb broad bursts into my room and is standing at the end of my bed and says, "what the f@ck is in this room? who the f@ck are you?".

what a lady!!!

my top burst. i said an explicit or two, told her to get out and she slammed my door closed. classy i know, but if she didn't poke the sleeping bear it wouldn't have happened now would it?

saturday i went to brunch with a couple of friends in town at juniper grill went home and got ready.

it was now poo poo's wedding time! it couldn't have been a more beautiful day in cleveland.

the ceremony was at st patrick's church in ohio city and the reception was at the union club downtown (BEAUTIFUL venue and church by the way).

of course i cried when they said their vows, you can just tell by looking at them how much they adore each other. i wish them nothing but happiness. oh and by the way i am getting them the restaurant gift certificate with lots of saran wrap - thank for everyones comments! : )

after the ceremony we had a few hours to waste, er, drink away.

the group headed to the map room where we ate hot pretzels, sat outside, drank 007's and discovered my new favorite shot. it is called something like a coffee taco mistiburr informed us all of it and i'm now obsessed with it. it is coffee patron and bailey's. sound gross right? well it ISN'T. go have your local bartender whip one up, you won't be sorry.

so we all head to the reception and the party began.

i wish i took more pictures. but i was too busy socializing - damn my butterfly tendencies.

i also have been given rules for the pictures i post from the wedding.

per poo poo's and her "husband's" request
-no pics of "her husband"
-no pics of poo poo's parents
-no pics of "her husband's" parents

i guess they think they are ballers huh? ; )

what stinks is that the majority of my pics include the aforementioned people! i have the BEST pic of poo poo's hubby with an open shirt. it's beyond hilarious.

oh well internets. the crazy side of the wedding will forever be kept a secret.

so onto the pictures i'm
allowed to show everyone...


shel, tigger, mistiburr, holla and muffin -check out the band outfits-SHOUT! rocked!


muffin and the beautiful bride poo poo!


pete's in the phone booth - yeah baby!


there is whiskey in mistiburr's coffee cup


muffin and i really really like close-ups

so those are pretty much the only pics i can put up, damn rules....

dancing to enrique escape was the funnest ever. the whole UD crew still remembers our choreographed moves. here's how it goes....

also i have the BEST video of some of my guy friends doing the monkey roll and i have no uploaded it FOUR times to you tube and i keep getting an error. i give up, for now.

after partying till 4am in the ritz-carlton bar and thinking it was a good idea to try to play the piano with one eye closed it was time to go home.

i woke up sunday morning with a serious case of the booze blues, called my mom and she drove up from canton to hangout with me. mommy you are awesome!

we went and had brunch at the westside market cafe (best breakfast in cleveland) and then went to see the incredible hulk (i liked it!).

the highlight of the sunday though was me getting a new phone, a blackberry curve! YAY!

i also want to wish my dear friend MOB happy birthday!!! me love you long time xoxo.

[2008 wedding count - 2]

miss you

Sunday, June 15, 2008

i often think about what my life would be like if my father didn't pass away suddenly of carbon monoxide poisoning when i was only 9 years old.

my emotions go from sadness to flat out anger that i grew up without a dad.

it ticks me off when people say that i'm stronger because of it - that is hardly the case.

i can't even type this stupid post without crying. pretty strong huh?

it's not fair that he was taken away from me when i was so young. i'm selfish in that respect. i want his larger than life personality around me, i want a dad.

i just know it would have been so much easier for me if he was around for me growing up. it was hard on my mom, all the sacrifices she made.

i think about him every.

single.

day.


especially today.

i miss you dad.

today is a good day

Friday, June 13, 2008

guess where i am? sitting on my couch, NOT at work.

((picture me doing the happy dance))

i love my job really really i do. i love it more than i have ever liked a job before. but this girl NEEDED a day off.

and what better reason to take a day off than poo poo's wedding!

i just got home from the westside. this girl got a little too intoxicated to drive last night. the westside is a blackout hole for me i swear.

actually, i think i'm
still drunk! whhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat??

ugh.

so last night myself, MOB, foxxy and mo when o
ut to celebrate MOB's birthday. which is actually on monday but with all the wedding festivities we decided that last night would be the perfect evening to celebrate.

we had dinner at
ty fun thai bistro in tremont.

wow, this place was amazing.

i have heard nothing but good things about this restaurant and it sure lived up to it's reputation.

i order pad thai - extra spicy. i wish i had left overs, but being the president of the clean plate club that doesn't happen often.


after ty fun we walked next door to flying monkey pub where we sat on the patio (which i never even knew existed btw). our friend drew and nicole came and met us and after rounds and rounds of cocktails it was time to head to westpark to meet up with tigger.

tigger is a good friend of ours from UD in town for the wedding. she lives in LA now and upon getting off the plane she was like seriously it is SO hot here. yes it is tigger, it's called humidity. haha


we headed to
pj macintyres for more rounds and bombs then walked our butts to the public house or as i like to endearingly call it, the black out house.

at this point my keys were taken and place in the tip jar. yes, my volvo was given as a tip.

tigger, foxxy, MOB and i all drank and laughed way too much, hopped in a cab and had a sleepover at MOB's with monti the wonder dog.

now i'm going to lay down for an hour and then get ready and for poo poo's bridal luncheon at the
rocky river wine bar and after that we are going to get manis and pedis at venitian nail spa.

today is heaven. pure heaven.

this is going to be a fun weekend, hope yours is too : )

five-knuckle-shuffle on your franklin

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

before i started working at my current position i was very lucky to live a block away from my office – it was a very very short drive.

i didn’t drive, silly! you believed me for a second didn’t you?

ok back to the story, so i'm walking out of my apartment building on a random weekday morning last may. the sun was shining, the sky was blue and there were finally leaves on the trees. today was going to be a good day i thought.

as i cross st clair ave walking on west 9th street i notice a man standing in the middle of the side walk looking right at me.

i continue to walk towards him, not being able to miss him considering we are the only two people on the street.

as i get closer to him i notice that this gentleman who seems to look normal (dressed professionally and what not) is messing with something by his pants.

his nether regions actually…

he was choking the chicken

beating his meat

working the self serve pump

having a solo conversation with his love muscle

getting in touch with the one eyed monster

shall i continue?

my mouth open in awe (which is probably exactly what he wanted to see), i look down at his you know what, look up at his face, look down at his you know what, look up at his face - not knowing exactly what to do.

he catches my eye right as I’m about to pass in front on him and he says, “hey baby, want some of this?”

i quickly pass by him without saying a word - where is carl monday* when I need him!

so instead of ignoring the salami stroker i swung around and start yelling at him.

i sternly point at him and screamed, “what the fuck is wrong with you?!? you are one fucked up dude!!! What the hell are you doing?”

obviously knowing full well what he’s doing.

but he just keeps stroking away.

at this point a gentleman cleaning the money out of the parking meters also sees what is going on and looks at me like I should be doing something. i'm thinking um, YOU are the city worker don’t you have connections or something, ugh? he was an idiot and no help so I took matters into my own hands.

i whip out my cell phone and call 911.

operator: 911, what’s your emergency?
me: there’s a man on the corner of w 9th and st clair masturbating!
operator: right now?
me: YES! he is ON THE CORNER. Publicly whacking off! call a cop in the area, we have a sexual predator on our hands!
operator: i don’t know if we have anyone in the area right now. what is he wearing?
me: shit, he’s on the move! he’s walking towards west 6th street down st clair, he’s wearing a red checkered shirt and slacks.
operator: is he still masturbating?
me: i don’t know i can’t tell! seriously, where are the cops?

a minute later i see a cop rolling down st clair.

now i have no idea if he they ever caught the staff strummer from my awesome 911 call but i felt better about myself for making it.

as i walked the rest of the way into my office i started laughing out loud while riding in the elevator. only me I thought, only me.

*if you want to watch the funniest daily show clip ever about cleveland’s own investigative reporter carl monday jackin’ it go back to his name and click the link, you won’t be sorry. if you’re too lazy to look back up through the post, i made another link conveniently for you all right here.

help me pick out poo poo's wedding present

Monday, June 9, 2008

if you read my blog regularly you know that my friend poo poo is getting married this weekend.

and of course i haven't bought her and her fiance a wedding gift yet, which is oh so typical of me.

i just don't know what to get them! i have this thing where i don't like simply writing people a check for their wedding gift - especially such a good friend of mine. and the other issue is that their registry is shot, like completely fulfilled now, although i did get her a shower gift off her registry a month ago so it's partially my fault.

so what do i do? i asked poo poo what they wanted flat out. of course she's like, "i don't care! you don't even have to get me a gift. i just want you there and to have fun!"

bull shit.

i know exactly what her fiance samson wants. he told me the night they got engaged.

we were all at little bar downtown waiting for the newly engaged couple to come show off poo poo's new rock. when they arrive i'm chatting with the couple about how excited i was for them blah blah blah.

i asked samson how excited he was for the wedding. he replied, "basically i'm thinking of this as a business venture. i'm in it for the cash."

we laughed because he was kidding, yet being slightly honest. buying a seat on the chicago board of trade isn't cheap ya know.

from that point i got lippy with him saying that he wasn't getting ANY cash from me. i was going to take the $100 i would spend on them and buy them something practical and useful.

i told him i was going to go to the dollar store and buy them 100 rolls of saran wrap.

yup, saran wrap.

everyone needs it so why wouldn't it make a great gift?!?!

so the saran wrap joke continues and i still threaten samson and poo poo that they will be receiving a big box full of plastic wrap on their door step after their honeymoon.

who says i'm teasing though? muah-ha-ha

the other option for a gift is buying poo poo a $100 gift card to this restaurant il mulino in chicago that apparently she is dying to go to and samson hasn't taken her. i can even buy the gift card online and send it to their condo. easy right?

or is it lame? i mean do people actually give restaurant, albeit a very good restaurant, gift cards for a wedding gift?

i'm so confused. and of course i discussed all of this with poo poo because i'm horrible with surprises - i can't keep gifts secret it's a major flaw of mine. one of like the three flaws i have.

so i decided to ask you my dear readers. what should i get poo poo and samson for their wedding gift?

option 1: check for $100

option 2: 100 rolls of saran wrap from the $1 store

option 3: $100 gift card to il mulino

option 4: __________________ (fill in the blank, you tell me!)

and of course i need your help ASAP due to the wedding being oh, in 5 days. majority rules so i'm going to listen to you all, especially everyone that is already married. what were some of your favorite gifts? help!

[sidenote - poo poo is fully aware that her wedding gift is going to be picked by my readers. it was actually her idea. she's nuts i tell you, nuts!]

birthdays, saganaki and flowers, oh my!

Sunday, June 8, 2008

i'm tired. my feet hurt, my back hurts and right now as i write this is probably the first time i have cooled down all weekend.

but am i complaining? no. well maybe i will tomorrow, but not right now because this weekend was awesome.


friday night my cousin grog had his family's end of the school year BBQ which also coincided with his 40th birthday. that means that they had to kick it up a notch and boy did they.

two of my friends from home decided to join me as well at this kick up a notch BBQ/birthday party. j-birdie and mishler got quite the does of my families fun time : )

my cousins are known for their parties - this one was catered and had a dj, face painting, cotton candy and snow cone machines, a bazillion people and oh did i mention the
event staff?!?!

yes this party required event staff due to the massive inflatable competition obstacle course, bungee cord basketball and big pirate jumpy castle thing. can you say f-u-n?

arrrrrrrrrrrgh me matey, find the treasure kids


can you handle the adrenaline rush?

my friends mishler and j-birdie racing to the top of the obstacle course - mishler wins! although they both flash a couple of 12 year olds in the process...

the party was a huge success for my very worthy cousin - he deserves it. happy birthday groggy!

so saturday i was commissioned to work at my church's festival (
st haralambos), in the saganaki booth like i have for the last ten years or so. this year it was going to be fun because we had three mommies and three daughters all working together. seeing that we have all grown up together there was lots of bitching and teasing which makes it that much more fun.

the saganaki team - minus myself, plus troy just sitting there looking pretty

what is saganaki you ask?

well basically it is fried flaming cheese. we use a hard greek cheese (kefalotiti - i have no idea how to spell it), put it through an egg wash then coat it with flour. place the cheese in a frying pan with LOTS of butter cook till soft on each side. douse with barcardi 151, light on fire then put the fire out with fresh lemon. serve with slices of pita and ta-dah, you have a heart attack on a plate, er, i mean saganaki!

look at me multi-tasking and playing with fire. safety first! haha

between eating saganaki and loukamathes (honey and nut doughnut puffs), i pretty much can't let myself eat for the rest of the week. thank god the greek fest is only once a year.

my thea susie and cousin kristen making loukamathes - fried deliciousness at its finest.

check out the flame olga got on this saganaki. opa!

st haralambos' finest hellenic greek dancers - oh and miss sara who decided to sneak herself into the line and relive some old times.

as fun as making saganaki is it is hard work. it was 90 degrees plus all weekend and flaming cheese in your face doesn't exactly give you a cool sensation. by midnight we were packed up and heading home with another successful festival under our belts.

today my mom and i went looking for flowers to plant in the pots on my deck. i'm very happy with what we got and once i got back to cleveland i planted them right away. although the very strong wind coming off the river caused me to partake in a dirt shower ewwwww. it was worth it because now it feels even more like summer on my deck.

one of my window boxes - they still need to grow in and bloom, give it a day or two

my biggest pot - again, everything still needs to grow in but it's so colorful! yay!

so that's my weekend in a nutshell, hope everyone had a great weekend too!

this time next week i'll be detoxing from poo poo's wedding, oh lord.

you say mojito, i say MOJITO!

Friday, June 6, 2008

last night i was invited to check out the vip summer opening of RumbaR in the intercontinental suites hotel in downtown cleveland.

free food and drinks? check.

it's about time this blog started getting me some free drinks : )

the georgia peach was my date for the evening. and after driving to the intercontinental hotel on carnegie we realized that we were at the wrong location. the outdoor RumbaR was at the intercontinental SUITES hotel a few blocks west. who knew?

once we arrived at the hotel we were directed by a
very friendly staff to RumbaR. bring on the mojitos!

once we walked in the bacardi girls greeted us with drinks. nice! but we decided that we wanted to make our own drinks at the make your own bacardi mojito bar - RumbaR actually hosts mojito making parties, if you like to muddle with the best of them i would call for more details.

here's the georgia peach making a peach mojito - how perfect!

after our 45th mojito (peach and raspberry, oh my!) we realized that we needed some food. the fatties that we are ate about 4 of everything - crabcakes, hawaiian steak roulade, chicken and feta flatbread, etc - all excellent. i definitely recommend you checking this place out for lunch or happy hour.

we met some great people at the event and even left with some great swag bags - heck yes i'll enjoy my table 45 gift certificate thank you very much.

after the event georgia and decided to head over to the east fourth neighborhood and sit on the patio at wonder bar and people watch.

let me tell you we got quite a show. the street was packed with concert goers heading to the house of blues for the solange knowles concert. these girls were working the street like it was their cat walk making for excellent people watching.

we buddied up with a couple of people at wonder bar and ended up laughing our butts off and even driving them back to their hotel (aren't we generous?). all in all a great thursday night out.

i came home and packed a suitcase extremely buzzed up for my weekend in canton (again!) for the cousin's birthday party extravaganza and my church's greek fest. opa!

have a great weekend everyone : )

how about a nice slice of pavement pizza?

Wednesday, June 4, 2008


while living in the warehouse district of downtown cleveland like i have been for the last few years i have realized that you can tell how rowdy the night before was by the piles of puke you have to walk over the next morning.

i'm not kidding.


walking down w 6th street on a saturday or sunday morning is like walking through a field of land mines. watch the f out!

reason #634 why i hate w 6th on the weekends, but that's another story. stupid amateurs.

so this morning while walking to my car i saw one pile of vomit outside of sunset lounge. not too shabby for a tuesday night out.
i was so close to taking a picture of the pile and sharing all of the glorious chunks with the internet but i decided against it. your loss.

thankfully i have the downtown cleveland alliance and their team of smiling sidewalk cleaners making my neighborhood clean and safe. hip hop hooray.

so last night wonger and i had a girly date night. and after an awesome building to building mattress move with my new roommate nate i deserved a glass of wine, or 4.

we decided on
bar cento for a late dinner and drinks. we were shocked to find the place so busy for a tuesday night, good for bar cento though!

my birkenstock wearing vegetarian friend wonger went with the veggie burger while i went with my favorite the sunnyside pizza - covered with pancetta, sunnyside up eggs, cheese and lots of black pepper you really can't find a better combo. um, yum.


after bar cento we headed to
market avenue wine bar, the service sucked and it was so quiet in there we left ohio city and headed back downtown.

next stop mercury lounge, we haven't been there in awhile. but it was like old times with the seriously stiff drinks - man, did we used to spend a lot of time there. and it was still fun last night. it was i love the 80's night with dj k.c. and although wonger and weren't on the dance floor, there was A LOT of chair dancing going on.

as we were walking back we were surprised again by the amount of people out and about. i guess it's officially summer - bring it on.

i scream, you scream.

Monday, June 2, 2008


hello, my name is alexa, and i am an ice creamaholic.

it's been a problem for me since around the age of 12 when i would sneakily ride my bike to the ice cream stand at the end of my street, order a double scoop of hershey's chocolate peanut butter and ride home without my mom ever knowing. she would think i was off getting exercise around the neighborhood. nope, i was sneaking ice cream!

all the signs of an addict right?

the wretched drug of creamy deliciousness just isn't safe around me. i even steal it from people i love! i can't tell you how many replacement half gallons of mint chocolate chip ice cream i had to buy for bird when we lived together - and i don't even like mint chocolate chip!

when i used to babysit i would rank the houses not buy the ease of the baby sitting job, but by the ice cream selection. the second those brats were in bed, my grubby mitts were in the freezer.

most people get buttered popcorn at a movie, i get ice cream. bon bons, dibs, whatever they're selling i'm buying.

i'm like a chubby amy winehouse looking for my next fix.

i'm even eating ice cream right now while i'm typing. it's in milkshake form and is attached to my head via an awesome ice cream drinking helmet - who cares if it was originally made for beer?!?! if there was beer flavored ice cream, i'd eat it!

i totally think i have a mutant ice cream eating gene that has been passed down to me by my mother. with this addiction all i can say is, "i learned it by watching you mom!"

my mom is an ice creamaholic too. she was always up for a bittner from taggarts. she probably feed my ice cream instead of baby formula. damn you stepho!

i often ask myself, why could i be addicted to something healthy? like broccoli or carrots, working out or volunteering with the elderly.

nope, god had to give me one hell of a battle to fight. the battle of putting the ice cream scoop down.

there have been highs and lows with this addiction. high's are when i choose to eat a skinny cow ice cream sandwich instead of a pint of ben and jerry's chubby hubby. low's are when i eat the whole pint of said chubby hubby.

if i keep eating all this chubby hubby my chubby ass isn't going to be finding a hubby.

i recently discovered cleveland's own mitchell's homemade ice cream. their turtle sundae?!? to die for. and considering summer and warm weather makes me want ice cream all the more i'm thinking this mitchell's turtle sundae discovery could be bad news for me.

freaders, please tell me i'm not alone. is there a support group out there?! is there a 12 step process to ween me off of the ice crack?

ahhhhhhhh! well i give up for now. my milk shake helmet is almost gone - time to refill.

so what's your favorite kind of ice cream?