it's time to reserve the church

Thursday, September 17, 2009

it's no secret here on this blog that i want to get married and have kids.

but it's finding a man that i adore as much as he put up with adores me that's my current problem. i can't help it, i know who i want.

so when my sister sent me a video from "video mate" last night of full of hot single available men, i couldn't wait to click play.

but then i did.

and i couldn't stop laughing/crying/jumping for joy, so thank you sissy.

thank you for finding my future husband (monroe) - at exactly the 3:12 mark.

two words - cleveland browns.

oh, there's one more word i should add to my love for monroe - sarcasm.

please, please watch the whole video because it's amazingly awesome.

my favorite hilarious "hot single male" comments of note:

maurice (0:20) - "hi, i'm maurice. an executive by day, and a wild man by night"

monroe (0:24) - "hi, i'm monroe. and you've probably already noticed that i have incredibly blue eyes"

maurice, again (0:50) - "i'm not afraid to get sand on the tuxedo, if your not afraid to let the wind mess up your hair a little bit when i take the top down"

guy with deer on sweater (1:00) - "hi mom"

the knight (2:07) - "at night i operate a damsel in distress hotline. i guess you'd call me a knight"

the entire "fun" montage.

how are these people so awkward?

it's brilliant.


  1. oh this was awesome. I thank you because I needed this to cheer me up!

    the viking guy was awesome!

    that's why your wiser than's Steven.

    "what I'm not looking for is some big overgrown monster who is always thinking about food"

    no fatties or hamsters!

    dude reading his "script" and messing it up! and then he mmmmm's at slim legs hahah

  2. Are YOU the goddess, alexa?

    Are you?

  3. You hooker! I was so posting this tomorrow.

    I have more gems up my sleeve...

  4. I love the guy who can barely read. That's what I look for in a man! Also, Mike. "If you're sitting here watching this tape smoking your cigarette, well, hit the fast forward."

    Foxy goddess!

  5. My favorite was the "Goddess" man at 1:47. He looked like a cross between Bender from The Breakfast Club and Jim Morrison.

  6. Simply amazing. I got dibbs on viking-man.

    Hi Mom!

  7. Marry me.

    Wait...dammit! I'm not a guy.

    Who cares, marry me anyway.

  8. you're welcome! ha ha

  9. They were all fine men, why choose just one?

    Is this video from the 1970s?

  10. HAHA - I love it.

    My favorite is the one who is "interested in most phases of data processing" - what a catch

  11. Saw this yesterday and am a better person for it. Now I know how to get the ladies.

  12. freakin hilarious!!

    I'm so glad we didn't date in the 80's! Geesh!

  13. i'm the goddess!!

    holyfuck, this is AMAZING.

  14. haha. that one dude's occupation was "body designer"

  15. Hahaha!

    So many gorgeous eligible men there that suddenly I am so glad to be single. What a wealth of talent out there for us. Wow.

    (Obviously I am being sarcastic.)

    (Or am i???)

  16. Heehee. So much to plumb here. How do I get my guy to wear the multistripe sock look?

  17. Dude, the Viking totally kicks ass! This is 80's gold man.

  18. This made my afternoon! No overgrown monsters looking for food? Shit, i'm out.

  19. Bwa! Hahahhahaha!

    That is awesome. Thank you for improving my afternoon one thousand percent.

    Or, should I really be thanking Maurice? Wild man, indeed.

  20. Hahaha- I love the dude who specifies that he's "not looking for some giant monster who is thinking about food all the time." Thanks for the clarification sir!

  21. I'm totally creeped out right now!

  22. Thanks for this, this made me definitely laugh, I had a Match flashback too

  23. Ugh I can't view the video and it seems like it was loads of fun.

  24. what here is not to love?

  25. why must you post youtube videos when you know damn well my dial up connection cannot handle them? booooooo

  26. I think I almost died of laughter reading and watching this! Such awkward guys. YOu are an amazingly entertaining writer. Great work!

  27. Omg, I literally just posted a pseudo-serious post about how I'm ready to fall in love, and then I roll over to the plum, and here you have the creme de la creme ready and waiting for me. Monroe and his incredibly blue eyes must be mine.

    That was just about the best post ever.

  28. I saw this on Ellen and realized that all my dream men stayed in the 80's.

  29. OMG, that was amazing.

    Since you're taking Monroe, I'm gonna take the guy at 1:49. I am a Goddess, after all.

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