cleveland is america's most miserable city? no thanks forbes.

Friday, February 19, 2010


i can't even count how many emails/texts/gchats i got yesterday once the news broke that forbes magazine named cleveland america's most miserable city - it was like they called my baby ugly or something.

oh.

no.

they.

didn't.

don't make me take off my heels, son.

i'm not quite sure why forbes magazine has it out for the city that i voluntarily choose to call home.

recently forbes has named cleveland one of the 'fastest dying', 'worst winter weather', and now 'most miserable' cities.


because of these "awards" i'm very curious of something... who on your staff of writers has a personal grudge towards cleveland?

was someone's wife stolen by a man who lives in cleveland? is someone a steeler's fan? does someone hate all things rock and roll?

because i simply can't wrap my head around the fact that my city has become the scapegoat for all things miserable.

i mean, have you been to jersey?

oh! and for an extra knife in my heart my hometown of canton, ohio is 9th on the list of most miserable cities - NINTH?!?!

seriously.

also, when talking about cleveland being oh so miserable can you (forbes), please not bring up the cuyahoga river burning?


is that topic EVER going to die? it happened in 1969!

apparently the cuyahoga river burning is like an STD that is simply never going to go away - no matter how many shots of penicillin you give it.

it's safe to say i'm a cleveland fan, an online advocate even.

between the lake, our food scene, our sports teams, our hospital systems, museums, the rock hall, educational institutions and the fact that i live here, cleveland is pretty damn awesome.

sure cleveland is going through some tough economic times, but show me a city right now who isn't adversely affected by the economy.

but to call it miserable?

not so much.

i shake my fist at you forbes magazine because i love everything about cleveland and i'm nowhere, NOWHERE, near miserable.


so quit being so hard on the city that i love to call home before i have to call lebron to come kick your ass.

on that note... have a good weekend, kids!

UPDATE: so yeah, i created a Cleveland says, "No Thanks, Forbes" group on facebook - you should probably join.

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61 comments:

  1. I'll help you punch any of those self righteous forbes people anytime! Cleveland lookslike a cool place from all the posts you've published. I even wanna go there if I visit the states again, don't let those people bring you fabulous rock and rollas down ;)

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  2. Let's go kick their collective asses!!! I was born and raised in Cleveland, had to move for work, but am still INFINITELY proud of my hometown.

    Cleveland, besides possessing an incredible amount of culture and class, boasts, by far, the finest, most loyal people I have EVER known. I'll fight anyone who says different!!

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    1. Excuse my, I am Here for 35 years, Cleveland can be much better but Dems corrupt criminals and liberals destroy all who touch. Criminals association group in power in Cleveland. I Don't proud Cleveland no more, here because a hell live, where a mayor and black with fraud win all a times. I you see different that are because you are a sick mental liberal. I no have any choice move out, I am force live with evil in a hell. Where Police majority are corrupt and criminal also was and is a corrupt Prosecutor, plus liberals not tolerate nothing who are NOT liberals, who are not a majority. Cleveland was a better place in a past, but are no more and for coincident where are liberals all come miserable. See where well how are all around reality not dream. But is in a way where Dems and liberals go down and can't stop, real Justice who can't stop and never will. A time where liberals will have two choice only, or calm down or moving to Mexico.

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  3. Amen.

    I say we storm Forbes HQ with pitchforks and torches...give them the Art Modell/Carlos Boozer/Braylon Edwards treatment.

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  4. I'd say let's fuck them up, Cleveland style. Which...involves...a burning river or something?

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  5. Here's where FORBES FAILS big time in their analysis. Would you rather live in a city with challenges on in the middle of fucking nowhere? Give me a break. We love cities for their urbanity, their edge, their grittiness on top of their cool hang outs, their sports teams and their fucked up politicians. I wouldn't trade my #10 Chicago for anything. And you can better believe I don't give a damn about Forbes, either. =)

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  6. I've never been to Cleveland, but you make it sound awesome. My biggest issue with the Forbes list is that it sounds like they put a lot of stock in how the sports teams are doing. Umm, 'scuse me? How is that any kind of indicator? And hello, if it is, don't the Cavs get any credit whatsoever?

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  7. I was about to leave a similar rant on my blog about this ridiculous listing, but you've summed it up perfectly. WTF right?!

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  8. With the Medical Mart, Aquarium, Flats AND Burke Airport renovations and the casino all coming in - the next ten years should remove us from a lot of these lists.

    Especially if Bron stays / brings us a championship and the Indians' young talent produces a winning team for a few years.

    And we keep the river from starting on fire.

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  9. Right on. I only spent a week there for business and I was smitten with Cleveland. The architecture and feel of a midwestern industrial city is home to me. And the people are great. Next time my wife goes there for business, I fully intend to take vacation time to go with.

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  10. this.is.PROPOSTEROUS! maybe they should actually take into account the people that live there because i doubt enough are miserable to put it in the top spot. and chicago is #10? this list is obviously bogus!

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  11. You forgot about PlayhouseSquare. I think that makes Cleveland pretty awesome.

    Sorry had to do a shameless plug to my employer.

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  12. Girl, I feel you on this. STL was on that list, too. Instead of just looking at the rates of crap, why don't you actually poll the residents and see how they feel about thier fine cities?

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  13. Let's not forget that just last summer Forbes gave Cleveland the high honor of being called a top city for singles! Only the married people must be miserable around here. There seems to be a lot of married people, after all.

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  14. P.S. not my opinion, just applying the same convoluted logic that Forbes does in creating these things.

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  15. Dang Forbes really had it out for Ohio. I was really surprised that LA was not on the list.

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  16. If I never hear anything about the burning river, I'll be a happy girl.

    Let's invite the editors here and show them a good time.

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  17. Awwww well that was insulting to say the least. Damn you, Forbes !

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  18. I wonder if we could block Forbes.com from the entire Cleveland area. They don't deserve our hits! Well, at least not that kind of hit.

    It seems like they are so completely full of negativity that I have no desire to ever visit the site. I had many of the same questions/thoughts that you expressed here. Thanks for putting it out there.

    Calling us miserable because our Sports teams choke is like calling a parent miserable because their child doesn't grow up to be a doctor!

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  19. Damn...Ohio really took a beating on that list.

    But I have to agree with two things: what you said about Jersey (you ain't kidding) and their inclusion of Philly.

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  20. how is it even possible to list Cleveland as more miserable than Flint, MI?

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  21. There was no need to bring Jersey into this! NJ rules and has lots of awesome cities within it.

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  22. Right on! Cleveland has plenty going for it. Sure there are areas we'd like to improve, but realistically, what city doesn't? I mean, Newark, NJ....sure that's on the list....but have you ever turned down the wrong street in Los Angeles? Now that's what I call miserable!

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  23. Here's where I'm at. I apologize if I repeat what anyone has said [I didn't read all the comments :-(]
    Dear Forbes - Ever hear the phrase 'don't knock it til you try it'? Cleveland is THE BEST city to live in. Our harsh winters make us stronger individuals. Our suffering sports teams will make that championship taste so much sweeter. Our river hasn't caught fire since Nixon was in office. Our diverse population has taught me about other cultres and customs (and fantastic food). We have some of the hardest working people in America. We help each other when times are tough. We have the best owner in the NBA who is doing everything he can to revitalize the city. We're renovating neighborhoods and adding industry. We're creating jobs where none should be found. I spent (wasted) 2 years of my life in New Jersey. When I moved back home in the winter of '07, I was never happier. This is MY city. And I take advantage of all the wonderful expieriences it has to offer. DEFEND CLEVELAND!!!!!!

    (sorry...got a little carried away at the end!)

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  24. I bet you Sarah Palin and her supporters have been giving out these negative "awards" to Cleveland. She is evil!!!

    Have a wonderful weekend!

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  25. The hell?

    That said, DC is just waiting for you...

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  26. I lived in CLE for 14 months and have missed it ever since I left! Cleveland really does ROCK! Who are these fools at Forbes?!
    Speaking of Jersey...my husband commutes to work there...let's just say we refer to it as Sewark! And my husband is pretty miserable working there!

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  27. So, I'm a teacher in Stockton (last year's most miserable city and this year's second most miserable city) and there is no way that cleaveland is worse than this shithole. The minute the bell rings, I'm outta here because I can feel it sapping my joy.

    Cleaveland sounds awesome...seriously. And I have sympathy, because I live in Sacramento, CA which gets no love at all, thanks to SF and LA.

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  28. I chose to move here from Florida and I chose to love and remain here too.

    Forbes gonna make me get stabby on them

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  29. I moved here from Los Angeles 6 years ago, and this is the longest I have ever stayed in one city -- which says a lot. Sure I take issue with a lot of things and get the urge to move again, but it hasn't happened yet because the pros of staying here out weight the cons.

    I grew up in Michigan and I always say, Cleveland is PARIS compared with Detroit. Also, the winters here are not that harsh, I've seen way worse.

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  30. Those assholes obviously don't read your blog (or Sarah's), because I swear Cleveland sounds like so much fun, I want to come live there!

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  31. I went to law school in Cleveland, and loved it. I too was personally offended when I read this yesterday in Forbes. I spend most of my time defending Cleveland to my "Holier than Thou" (city-wise) east coast friends. Currently I live in Philly, and I can say, without a doubt, that Philly is FAR more miserable than Cleveland will ever be. I miss Cleveland specifically, and Ohio in general, every time I drive my seven mile commute home and it takes me 1.25 hours. Cleveland Rocks!

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  32. I knew you would rise to the occassion of defending "your city" but no defense for your hometown, missy? Have to agree with MOB, Playhouse Sq is the best theater district outside of NYC and there's Lake Erie too. XOXO

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  33. as my friend maggie would say.
    "i'm gonna cut a bitch!"
    i seriously want to complain. and i'm going to.

    i think we should lobby to have kurt badenhausen (really his last name is badenhausen?) to come to cleveland and experience it Lara/Alexa style...

    just make sure you're not financially detoxing!

    can't wait for tomorrow!!!!

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  34. they are jealous of lebron.

    and his giant poster downtown.

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  35. That is absolutely ridiculous! I was born and raised here in Canton and I love it! It is a great place to live and I love everything about the area. Forbes needs to rethink that list, I'm sure that somewhere in New Jersey is a very miserable little town.

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  36. Hey there -- I visit by way of Nilsa's blog :) I am from Toledo and saw this article yesterday and was also shocked with how many Ohio cities were listed! I agree with you -- hasn't anyone from Forbes been to Jersey? Or the ghetto slums of post-farmland Arkansas or Louisiana? I am with you, sister - so much greatness in Ohio and so little respect!

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  38. growing up in cleveland (amherst to be exact) and spending 18 winters and time when I was home from school, leaves me with a big "meh" of cleveland. i get to say this because I too, suffered through those sunless months, the air so cold it hurt to breathe, and the general ennui of midwestern american life. let's not kid ourselves here, you all know that cleveland can be downright miserable as it snows in april.

    not to mention your "scene" is not as relevant as you think it is. maybe it depends on your tastes. maybe you all like chain restaurants, cheesy sports bars, etc. but that's just like, my opinion, man.

    2 cents.

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  39. is it creepy to say that i'm a little in love with you after this post? cuz i totally am ;)

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  40. Detroit is on the list too. I think they need to spend some time in these cities before they write some bullshit based on statistics and news. There's a lot of good in these cities that they're covering with negativity.

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  42. I beg to differ.. We are headquartered 20 minutes away in Avon, OH and having traveled all over the world people just don't appreciate everything Cleveland has to offer until they leave.

    This was our first city we created travel videos of and the number of great things to see and do in this city is amazing. Apologies in advance for the link, but people need to see all of the stuff to do here!

    Cleveland Travel Videos

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  43. Amen sister! I couldn't have said it better myself! :)

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  44. I agree my hubby and I have been all over this country almost every damn state and some countries too (yes your ancestry land of Greece) we always are grateful for living in America and Cleveland is AFFORDABLE. I went on a recent trip to Chicago to get a visa to go to Greece and my waiters were Cleveland transplants. As i was lamenting to them how much Cleveland SHOULD be like CHICAGO I realized...I wouldn't be able to afford to live as close I do to downtown...so WE DO gain some things those other cities lack. I live in the equivalent of Mr.Rogers Neighborhood so shut up FORBES as long as we live in AMERICA nothing is miserable. Peace and I "HEART" your blog big time!

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  45. I can't imagine it being THAT miserable after all the fun stuff you post about. I mean, seriously, it's gotta be better than SLC!

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  46. Forbes needs to know that "Miserable" hardly defines us! ... They've certainly heard from many on their website. Cleveland has a way of coming together through good and bad times. Makes me proud! Had to put together a list of reasons why Cleveland is NOT miserable

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  47. I agree. Someone has a personal vendetta. Although, we did make the list for Best Cities for Singles.

    Guess misery loves company.

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  48. Forbes is full of absolute horse sh*t!

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  49. Don't take it too hard. They do the same thing to Chicago all the time, EVEN though we have some of the most amazing food/music/art/shopping/people in the world!

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  50. I haven't lived in Cleveland for 7 years now, but I miss it. It's still home to me, and I tell people how great it is every chance I get. I couldn't believe that there were FIVE Ohio cities on that list. FIVE out of TWENTY?? That's unreal. I think someone has it out for Ohio in general. Love your blog by the way :)

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  51. Allison and I talked about it this weekend. That shit is bananas. Forbes is gonna regret it.

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  52. I thought this was an awesome response to the Forbes Miserable Cities article. It's Cleveland-type retaliation at its best.

    http://suckstobeyoublog.com/2010/02/20/sucks-to-be-forbes-magazine-part-2/

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  53. I live in Cleveland too and I have to say... I totally have to agree with Forbes on this one. I also know several Cleveland police officers who would for sure agree with Forbes as well.

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  54. Not that it matter much, but the "researchers'" methods were completely flawed in determining the most miserable city. They looked at average temperature for AN ENTIRE YEAR, not just winter...which is why Cleveland scored higher than Minneapolis.

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  55. Are you "Happy in CLE+"? Tell us why for your chance to win a huge Cleveland prize package including hotel stays, meals, entertainment and more. Visit www.whattheforbes.com to learn how to enter and to find out why we're sure Cleveland is not the "most miserable city."

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  56. That is absurd. Seriously. I'm from NY and have had a lifetime of loathing Jersey. I'm completely with you on this.

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